Snow White, Jack and Blue-Black
Snow White, Jack and Blue-Black
This is a story of Snow White, a beautiful girl with snow white skin. She craved a shampoo that would enhance her blue black hair. She began extracting juice from sun-ripened plums and after much trial and effort, perfected a potion that worked so well she used it daily. And her shiny hair hung over her shoulders, washed, brushed, curled and combed. Oh how she smiled. But then came the end of the fruit season.
“Oh no,” said Snow White to the seven dwarfs over dinner one evening. “What shall I do now, I only have enough plum shampoo for two washes. I’ll never attract a prince without it.’
The next day when the dwarfs arrived home from woodcutting, Happy told her they’d heard of a good boy named Jack Horner who liked to sit in corners eating Christmas pies. Double jointed Jack had a knack of pushing his thumb through the crust to pull out plums. There were plenty Christmas pies full of plums at Jack’s house.
“Maybe he could spare some for me,” Snow White thought. She asked where Jack lived. Wrote down the address on her little pink notepad and said she would visit him in the morning. But when she knocked on his cottage door, and explained her predicament, he frowned.
Snow White’s face crumpled like sponge cake when you open the oven door too soon. “That’s not fair Jack, surely you could spare a few plums.”
Jack scratched his head. “Look, I know of a fruit tree full of plums. I could tell you where it is.”
“Yes yes.” She pulled out the notepad, he told her the directions and she drew a mud map.
“One thing I must add, the tree is only half full.” Jack confessed as they said goodbye. “Because I picked all the plums I could reach, and Grandma’s bottling them for me.”
Snow White made a mental note of the bottling idea. With luck she could preserve enough to last her through the off season.
The dwarfs came home as she was about to place a pot of soup on the checked table cloth. They heard her singing.
Oh how I want to climb up there
to gather fresh plums to juice my hair
“Climb up where?” Grinned Happy.
During dinner when she told them about the giant plum tree, they said they had seen it that very day. “It’s unbelievably huge.” Yawned Sleepy.
“I know what,” said Dopey wiping chocolate pudding from his lips, “If we stood on each others shoulders like circus acrobats, maybe we could reach the plums.”
“Thanks Dopey,” Snow White poured tea from the red pot. ”But by the sounds of it you’d still come up short. I’m sure I’ll think of something.”
But she didn’t have to because the very next morning, Happy dashed home to tell her some news. His face was red, he puffed and panted. He gulped a glass of water, then told her about a boy named Jack.
“Relax snow White, it’s not Not Jack Horner. This Jack planted a seed and up sprang a beanstalk overnight. It’s gigantic and guess what?”
“What what?” Snow White replied.
“The beanstalk is right next to the giant plum tree. I’m going back with the wheelbarrow now to fill it with plums for you.” He found the barrow and a bucket.
“Wait for me.” She took off her apron. “I’m coming too.”
As they set off in the sunshine, Happy said. “Jack’s been up and down the beanstalk already. Said an ogre of a guy with a voice like thunder lives at the top.” Snow White shuddered at the idea of the giant and decided that Jack must be very brave.
They saw the enormous beanstalk and stood in its shadow, long before they arrived at the base. Standing now beside the plum tree, Snow White tilted back her head. Tree roots were in the earth at her feet and high above were branches laden with blue black plums. The beanstalk was behind her and at that moment a movement from it made her spin around.
It was Jack on a return journey. He jumped the last metre and landed beside Happy. He looked at Snow White. “Sorry folks. Didn’t mean to startle you.”
After introductions were made, Jack took three golden eggs from his pocket. “It was worth going up there,” he grinned, “these should keep me and mum going for a while.”
“I’d rather have plums,” Snow White murmured.
Jack had never seen such a beautiful young lady. If she wanted plums he would fetch them. I know I’m no prince, and beauties like her are always after royalty, he thought, but maybe she’d be interested in me if I offer to help. I could climb up my beanstalk to pluck the plums. He had a quick word with Happy then arm muscles rippling, launched himself up the stalk.
Unbeknown to Jack, Snow White did notice his tanned arms and trim hips. He climbed higher and higher to gather plum after plum till the barrow was full to the brim.
They agreed to repeat the exercise again the next day. But when Happy and Snow White arrived there was no sign of Jack.
At the base of the beanstalk, they waited. After a time, the stalk began to wobble. Wobble and wave. Then the whole stalk thick as it was, started to bend.
A loud scream followed by a flash of blue whizzed past the stalk. It turned out to be Jack. He’d fallen the last three metres, jumped to his feet and yelled RUN.
The ogre was on his way down. Jack picked up an axe. Launched the blade into the beanstalk blow after blow after blow, until the huge stalk fell. With a deafening thud, the ogre crashed to his death.
The plum tree shook as if caught in a cyclone, and released enough fruit for eternity. Snow White didn’t waste a thing. She filled many bottles with shampoo enough to start her own business. Jack helped with finances, he’d robbed the ogre but learned that the money was rightfully his. Years ago, the ogre stole it from Jack’s father.
These days the seven dwarfs no longer chop wood, they help to run the shampoo business. Happy is even happier because he was the match maker for Snow White and Jack. They have several children and every single one of them has shiny, blue black hair.
The end Chris Tapper 2011 ©