Love's Memories
Silence danced amongst her shoulders as she stared into the empty field. ’Oh what have I done?’ was all that crept in her thoughts. Tears baring in her eyes, as she kept them shut. Still in a mind of shock, she tried to replay what led to this. This field, once filled with happy memories and the aroma of healthy love. Now just a field, with tear jerking sights and memories. With the aroma of now, pure sadness.
She tried to go back as far as she could go, into her memories. Then it hit her, the day she fell in love with him. The very moment they made eye contact. As the memory replayed in her head she fell to her knees, having her champagne blonde hair covering her face from view. Hiding her green eyes, which swim amongst a sea of evergreen tree tops. Hiding her perfectly beautiful bone structured face. Her limp body, finally giving into her strength and fell onto her side. The rain softly kissing her rosy pink cheek, running down onto the soft candy green grass.
Hours upon hours she laid in the grass wondering. Thinking on how this all happened. Memories clouding her mind, and tears drowning her eyes. She couldn’t understand, not in the littlest bit why he would do this to her. She had never done anything for this to all happen, not even close to making him hurt her like this. Why did he hurt her so? How could he do this to her? The memories flooding into her head, making her hurt even more.
The rain had finally lighten up, when she decided to attempt to get up. She was soak in wet and so very cold, for it was the middle of winter. Her black long sleeve shoulder hugging shirt clung to her frail body as if to hold on for dear life. Blue jeans hanging on her with the most uncomfortable form upon her legs. She felt even more heavy with all this water upon her clothes. So she just stayed amongst the ground. Clinging to it, crying into its blades. Every so often she would let out a scream and beat the ground. Finally sleep hit her and there she stayed dreaming. Dreaming her love’s memories.
.~.~.~.~.~.~.
It was sunny, hot, and humid. A perfect southern weather. Yippee, she had thought as she strolled along the sidewalk to school. “My first day of high school in a new town, this is just going to be the super! I mean who cares if I left all my friends behind. Who cares if I didn’t want to move because I was finally happy where I was?” These thoughts swarmed her mind as she drew closer to a teen’s hell in reality. As she walked up to the main building, someone bumped into her. Knocking her books onto the ground. “Great!! Its time to make fun of the new kid!” Without saying a word she dropped onto her knees and began to pick her books up. She hadn’t realized, that the person who had knocked her books onto the ground was helping her pick them up. Nor did she realize that they were talking to her.
“Miss? Did you hear anything I just said?”
She finally looked up to see who this person was. Her jaw dropped with pure shock and awe of this beautiful creature standing before her. His jet black hair swooping in front of his right eye, his dark brown eyes almost seeming as if they were black staring into hers, perfectly bone structured face and body! She felt so stupid for just staring, and felt so very rude.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to stare at you.”
Did she just apologize to this god for staring at his beauty? She did, because a small smile spread across his face. He was even more beautiful with that dashing damn smile. What the hell was wrong with her?
“Please, don’t apologize. For I was the one staring at such great beauty which was cast before my eyes.”
“Great a real charmer this one is. Damn it he is going to try to embarrass me. I hate guys like this.”
But even if he was going to just humiliate her in front of the whole school later down the road today. He was still beautiful and she really didn’t want to leave his presence. Yet then again, she knew at some point or another that time was going to come. It was going to come here very soon too. Oh the pain it brought to her, this beautiful stranger was going to have to leave her view. Going to leave her standing in awe and she would most likely never see him again. He kept her books amongst his rock hard torso and stood up. Extending a hand to help her, to her feet.
“New here huh? That’s cool, Welcome to town Suck-a-lot-a.”
She giggled, then broke out into what felt like a very bright blush. Once on her feet she gestured for her books, but the boy didn’t seem to understand. Or if he did he was acting like he didn’t realize she wanted her books back. But kept smiling down to her, then turned and held his arm out for hers to place. After she took the gesture he walked her to the office.
“Well hello, Mr. Cason. How might I be able to help you and your lil friend?”
A older woman with fire orange hair which was placed in a messy bun, pale splotchy skin, crooked yellow teeth hidden behind hooker fire truck red lipstick covered lips. She seemed to be in her early to mid fifties very late forty’s if younger. But she was so sweet, and apparently not married but with four children. For their pictures were everywhere amongst her desk.
“Good morning Ms. Dewsdell. My friend here is new to school and I was just assisting her. Help her find her way to the office to meet your beautiful self, and hopefully if she let me to her classes.”
He was so sweet and so soft. His voice was like that of Angels singing at the Golden Gates, to welcome you to heaven and letting you know that you really are dead. He was just amazingly beautiful in everyway. Apparently he really wanted to help her around also, so she felt just so at ease and safe.
“Aw, thank you Mr. Cason. You always know how to make me smile. Well what is your name sweetheart?”
It took the girl a second to realize she was talking to her, but as she opened her mouth and her lips began to move. It was in fact not her voice that came out. But that wonderful being next to her.
“Her name is Cadence Karena Ryan.”
Her mouth dropped yet again, but this time in just shock. How did he know her name?
“How do you spell that Ms. Ryan?”
This time she beat him to the punch, “ C- a- d- e- n- c- e K- a- r- e- n- a the just Ryan.”
Ms. Dewsdell just smiled and printed out a piece of paper then handed it to her.
“Please take a look at it and see if there is anything you would like to change. If so then let me know, if not it was nice meeting you and the counselor will most likely call you in sometime today or this week.”
She smiled and looked over the piece of paper. Her agenda arranged from Latin 1, Biology, English, World Geography, Dance, Photojournalism, Geometry, and then Algebra 1. She thought it looked nice and then realized that the beautiful creature which was called Cason was looking over her shoulder.
“Hmm… do you mind if I get something changed on here? I mean you already have a math class, and you cant get into this class if your still in this one.”
He pointed to Geometry to the Algebra. So she just shook her head and said sure.
When he came back she no longer had Algebra but Health instead. She smiled and told him thank you.
“No problem darling. Now you have all classes with me. Just the way I wanted it.”
He gave a small smile then blushed into all shades of pink and red.
.~.~.~.~.~.~.
When she awoke, it was finally dark in the sky. The stars were out looking down upon her. Seeming to smile upon her, then again seemed to weep with her. As she stared up to them, a few fell from the sky in sync with her tears. Her clothes were still wet and she was still cold. She hated the dream she had just had. Cadence couldn’t believe she just had a dream of the day she met the guy who abandoned when she needed him most.
She curled into another ball and wondered why no one seemed to be looking for her. Her cell phone hadn’t missed any calls nor texts. Was she really this alone? Could she have been really wrapped that much up in Cason that she didn’t even realize that she didn’t have friends or anyone who loved her? Once again she cried herself to sleep, and dreamed yet again.
.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Cason had walked her to all their classes as said before. Never once did he make fun of her, nor attempted to. He introduced her to all is friends and all those whom attempted to talk to the two. She couldn’t believe the day she was having. This was the best day of her life, so she thought. Yet sadly, she knew what she was feeling also. She was falling in love with this beautiful teen boy. He was always holding her hand and carrying her books for her. Always offering to be her partner in group activities during the day. But finally it was lunch. Cason offered to sit with her, but before she could say anything he was picking a spot. He bought both of their lunches and wouldn’t let her pay him back.
“No I want to buy your lunch. It’s the least I can do.”
Was all he would tell her. They sat in the middle of the court yard, sitting in the grass. Cason and Cadence talked and laughed during the whole lunch break. She laid down in his lap and he stroked her hair.
“So Cadence?”
“So Cason.”
He giggled a little and smiled. But just as quick as those showed upon his face and voice, they were gone. Replaced with seriousness.
“I know you hardly know me, and I am not trying to make a move on you. Not saying that your not worth it. Never mind anyways, I was wondering if you would like to carry this conversation and friendship after school, today.”
She was so shocked and yet so happy. Because he wanted to hang out with her after school and she didn’t want anything more. In a very dork-ish manner she forgot how to breath and simply just shook her head yes. He laughed a little amongst her response.
“That’s very cute, but sweetie.”
Here it is,
“But inhale. It will do us both better if your breathing and alive. I mean after all that would defeat the purpose of hanging out if you pass out. And well unable to spend time with me. Just me, no one else. Just us two, I mean if that is ok with you.”
She did has instructed and squealed which embarrassed her, but she jumped up and tackled hug him. Still she couldn’t speak but who needed words to realize that she was excited about later this afternoon.
“I take that as in your ok with it.”
He gave a sheepish smile and once again blushed all the colors of pink and red. Just as he did the bell rang for class to begin. Once again he held her hand and walked her to class.
Finally school had ended and Cason was offering her a ride home. That a way it was easier for them to just go straight from there to go hang out. She agreed, but warned him she might get them lost. For she wasn’t one hundred percent sure where she was resigned in living. He laughed once again, then said to her. “It would be a treat to get lost while being with you.” This time she was the one who blushed all the shades of red. She stared out the window having her hair cover her face, because she didn’t want him to see that he made her smile non stop. They found her house without any trouble and she ran inside to drop her books off. In fact it was the first time she had even held them since this morning.
“Mom? Dad? People? Um.. Ok later.”
She knew they were home, whether or not they could hear her she wasn’t sure. But she had her cell phone if they needed her. She tripped over something by the front door and fell face first. She prayed that Cason didn’t see that, but her prays were not with her. For she had tripped over Cason waiting for her by the front door.
“Oh holy, are you ok Cadence? I am so sorry I didn’t mean to trip you. I thought it would be better suited if I walked you back to the car instead of you walking by your self. I am so sorry. Please forgive me.”
Cadence, just stared up at him. “You tripped me?”
She could see the shame written all over his face. “Yeah, but not on purpose! I would never hurt you like that, well ever hurt you in any way! Please don’t hate me.”
Her eyes were wide open, she was so filled with shock. Then busted out full of laughter, “Oh Cason. Don’t worry about it. I am not mad at you. I am so embarrassed that I fell, I was hoping you didn’t see me fall. Don’t sweat about it. Please?” She smiled to try to lighten his mood, and let him know that she meant every word she said.
He just looked at her, then smiled. “Ok if you say so.” Once again he extended his hand down to her. “Do you realize this is the second time I had to help you up today? Both times because of me.”
With that she was up on her feet and laughed. Brushing the dust and dirt off her clothes. “Yeah, guess you like putting me on the ground, huh?” She froze were she was and then immediately started to apologize. “That came out not like what I meant. Oh gajesus I am so sorry.” He laughed and then helped her to the car. Once he was in the car, they were off.
“So where are we going exactly, Cason?”
“It’s a surprise that only I know about. No one else knows about it.”
.~.~.~.~.~.~.
With that last dream ending she shot up from slumber and started beating the ground.
“WHY? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME, CASON!?”
She cried even harder than before and screamed to the heavens. Shivering and weak, she figured she was gong to die here in this field. The field of all these heart aching memories. If she was not going to die from the cold, she was sure going to die of a broken heart. Just the way that Sir Johnny Cash went. Her all time hero, and now she was going to die with the same fate of the heart.
.~.~.~.~.~.~.
