Life: Story of a Mad Man | By: Anthony Jackson Jr. | | Category: Short Story - Other Bookmark and Share

Life: Story of a Mad Man

"Childish laughter, taunting me, beating me, tearing my soul from me..... "C'mon retard, get up!" children laughed, I felt the beating over and over again.
"STOP!" I heard the childish voice of myself turn up to say, the sunlight snatched my vision, blinding, a white light, a face, laughing, taunting, beating, as I cried, cried into a darkened rage.... My hands they grew blood coursed, the ground colored in deep crimson, the sun still burned in my eyes as tears raged there way through the ducts of my eyes, I looked around at the reason of the blood, he was dead, his emotionless eyes haunting me as his mouth hung open as if to say stop, or let go, his face filled with a fading fear, I'd done it. I made him go away, I hated him, he deserved it.
Sirens, endless sirens filled my ears. I couldn't move, I sat waiting, waiting for my punishment, the police swarmed the area, yet none came for me.
"He's only about ten." one officer announced when a female detective asked about my dealing with the crime. The officer gave no credit for my age I was only eight, my crying became laughter, as the tears still flown from my eyes as they burned red with hatred and horror, my laughter exceeded me, as I tossed my head back and laughed hysterically. I fell over backward, it felt like something hit me, it was as if a wild dog had run straight through me. It was the feeling that............."

I felt the sun creep upon my face, "WHAT?!" I snapped as my eyes snapped open, I was sitting up crouched down on my bed my knife's blade up against my arm as the hilt was being held down. I looked around, there was no one there. I sat down, the sheets were wet. I didn't know if it was from the dream or the girl last night, there was a knock on the bedroom door and a beautiful blonde walked in, wearing almost nothing, and sat down on the bed next to me.
I picked up the sheet, and looked at her, "Oh yeah, definitely her." I thought as she leaned in for a kiss and the tip of my knife's blade met her lower lip, "Mhhmmm, and you are doing what exactly?" I asked her smiling. She looked afraid, I liked it, the look on her face was amazing. I brought my knife down lower to her neck and pressed a little bit just to see what she was going to do. Surprisingly she tilted her head away from me and held back her hair exposing it to me. I didn't like that, I stuck the knife into her neck, a gasp fled her esophagus. I smiled as I snatched the blade from her neck, and watched her bleed to death as she covered the wound with her hands and her breaths shortened and she began wheezing. I closed my eyes and listened in the silent room, to the flowing blood, her attempting screams, and her frantic for air and life. I opened my eyes again and blood coursed all over me and the bed, and of course her body yet the look on her face still didn't satisfy me, she looked like a child that didn't know how to swim and was thrown in the water, gasping for air, drowning, and no one there to save her. I chuckled, and cleaned my knife off with the blanket. I pushed a button on the wall next to the bed and a maid came in, dressed in black.
"Yes sir?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow, I could tell she was looking at more than just my face considering I was in my boxers, "I see you had fun, when do I get to come in here? I wanna see you kill me." she said.
I laughed at her, "It would be too easy, you're so young and fragile. I don't know if I'd be able to bring myself to do it." I smiled at myself, as I ran my hand through my hair, it was long and black, and I needed to shave.
I stood up, "Clean up this mess, and maybe I'll let you in here tonight." I said as I watched her eyes follow my boxers.
"Good, because I'll be needing that snake of yours." she said walking by and flicking it. It was the most pain of my life I felt like I was dying but I showed her no fear nor pain, I turned around and placed the blade of my knife on the back of her neck. She didn't move, I slid it across her neck cutting off the ends of her beautiful red hair hair. She dropped to the floor, and stabbed me in the foot with a dagger, and slowly stood back up, "Stay there." she said and blew a kiss.
I didn't move yet I didn't show her the unbearable pain I was in either, I tried moving my foot to loosen the knife but she'd stuck it in pretty deep. She'd heard me wiggling and turned around and stepped up to me, looked me up and down, and went back down to my feet. She reached onto the ankle of her boot, and slammed another dagger into my other foot, "I said don't move." she said snatching my knife from my hand, I closed my eyes. Memories faded back to me.

"Remember the best thing is forgetting, forget everything around you. Nothing can break your focus. Now close your eyes." He said, he was an old man my mentor. My father wanted me to fight so he enrolled me in some sort of karate school.
I stood alone eyes closed, trying to be still but I was afraid. He swung at me and hit me in the chest I fell back wards and blacked out."

I opened my eyes again and everything seemed to vanish, well except for the nice ass of the beautiful woman affront me. I pulled up my left foot taking a step forward, "Fine you can have me now." I said slapping her ass, she snatched up and turned around her hands on the edge of the frame of the bed. She was smiling, as she rubbed her hands down me stopping at my dick, she grabbed it and stroked it all the way down. I stopped her hands and bent down, I snatched the knives from my feet and threw them into the high ceiling above us. I looked back down at her and picked her up as I frantically kissed away at her. Starting at her lips and leading to her neck, I moved her onto a dresser in the corner, I sat her atop it as I began taking off her black shirt, I snatched off her bra as I stopped kissing her and I just looked at her beautiful breasts, "Those are nice and big, how the hell did you hide them?" I asked, and she wrapped her hand around my dick again, my eyes faded closed then opened slowly as she stroked it up and and down. I kissed away at her as she gave me a hand job, "Pretty big." she said to me.
"Thanks, I get that alot." I said to her between kisses, I felt a sudden rush of pleasure surge through my body like electricity. I kicked the dresser, it broke as she fell, yet I caught her half way through her fall. I laid her on the floor, she reached up for my head for a kiss, yet I rubbed the insides of her legs, and pulled her leather pants off. She had no underwear, "Easy goes it?" I asked smiling and then going down between her legs eating away at her as she moaned. Her moans got broader as her hands placed themselves on my head, as my tongue flickered in and out off her, her fluids seeping amongst the floor and my face. I pulled my face up smiling and she pulled my boxers down with her feet, I snatched them off the rest of the way.
Her elbows were on the floor as her red hair fell over her beautiful face, her green eyes taunting me as her smile yearned for me. I was on me knees between her legs as I inched up toward her face, placing my hands on the floor next to her elbows, "How do you want it?" I asked her.
"Nice and hard, make it hurt." she said smiling putting one hand on my chest, and running it down as I lay into her. Her eyes widened and then softened again, she lightly moaned as I thrust in and out of her as hard as I possibly could.
She was a virgin, never expected that, she was saving herself for me. I could feel her thoughts, she was in pain but she loved every moment of it. Her moans became cries of pain tears clouded her eyes as she put one hand over her crotch. She screamed, "St--" she couldn't finish the word, but I knew she was going to say stop as she began leaking all over the floor and me.
"NO!" I said as I felt the sweat pour over my like a waterfall, I drilled into her harder and faster. I gripped her left breast, and fondled with it, then I slowed down
and began sucking her big pink nipples. They looked bigger without her shirt on, she removed her hand from her crotch. She breathed faster and deeper, a smile faded across her face. Her eyes closed, and she leaned back onto the floor. I took my hand from her tit and grabbed her wrists and holding them above her head on the floor, I once again drilled into her. Hard and fast, she screamed each time I dug into her, each stroke was more and more invigorating. She let out a loud scream that seemed to shake the house as she lurched up, and slowly she laid back down on the floor. I pulled myself from her and she shuddered, a drowsiness fell over her and she drifted off into a deep sleep.
I don't know why but I felt compelled to watch her sleep, she was so beautiful. It was like my soul was reaching out to grab her, but my hands nor heart listened.

"Damien... mmm" she murmured, in her sleep.

"What's she dreamin' about, that she's gotta call out to me for?" I thought as I could do nothing but watch her as she tossed and turned in her sleep and continuously repeated my name for reasons unknown. Eventually I retired from watching her and went to take a shower. I stood under the hot water, with my left hand on the wall and my head down letting my hair and the watter fall. My eyes were closed no need to open them for there was nothing to see.
An image of Mary, the maid, faded into my mind. She was sleeping mumbling my name.
There was a knock on the bathroom door, it was too hard for a woman and too rude for a mature man. It was probably Art; I have no idea what Art's problem is but he follows me everywhere. "Go away, Art I'm in the shower." I yelled, my eyes slowly opening.
"It's me." came Mary's voice.
I was surprised. "Come in" I offered, and of course she came in. I could hear her sliding off her clothes that she'd probably put back on, and she drew back the shower curtain and stepped in. She raised my head, and smiled at me, "Are you gonna kill me now?" she asked her smile fading, she was more interested in my answer than taking the shower with me.
"Should I?" I asked lowering my head again and closing my eyes, my back began to burn from the water.
"Well you kill all the other ones you fuck," she said I could tell she'd lowered her head and was beginning to cry, "so am I any different?"
I reached outside the curtain with my right hand without moving my head and I had grabbed a knife from the cabinet next to the shower. I Pointed it at her and I could feel both the water hit the blade and her sudden sense of insecurity. I placed the tip of the blade on her nose, "No, I'm not going to kill you." I answered softly, I couldn't believe I was saying that.
She didn't say anything, she kissed the top of my head and whispered three words..... "I love you."

Chapter 2: Insomniacs Dream

I dropped the knife, and was unable to move to bend down and pick it up. I was frozen, in shock by those little words..... I looked up at her in anger, lust, feeling like a caged dog but at the same time a sudden relief clouded my body. I didn't know exactly what it was that I felt, "What did you just say?" I asked her again slowly raising my head to her. Suddenly years of pain had come back from just those words she'd spoken. My feet killed, I looked down at the cuts along my feet they went all the way through and were bleeding like Niagara Falls.
"I said I love you." she repeated exiting the shower. I quickly snatched up the knife and swung at her with it. I missed, cutting open the curtain, the look on her face vivid with horror and confusion.
"You don't love me, do you?" she asked suddenly her mood dropping again, as mine only worsened.
"What exactly is this feeling you call love?" I yelled at her, only continuing to make it worse, tears began streaming down her face like river rapids.
"I HATE YOU! LEAVE ME ALONE!" she yelled as she snatched my shirt off the sink and ran, you could hear her sobbing through the house as she ran through the quiet mansion.
Why does this hurt? Why does it seem like I'm committing suicide? Is this what it feels like, this.... this... love? Am I killing her without a touch? It seems more like I've hurt myself, but I don't understand why I feel like this. I thought as I stood in the bathroom doorway watching her run down the hall crying as she tried to place on my shirt. I snatched my boxers and threw them on and went running after her.
I found her in the courtyard sitting under a tree singing and crying, "You know don't you?" I asked her, but she didn't answer. "Answer me dammit!" I exclaimed.
"Know what?" she asked as her melody paused.
"You know that I have trouble remembering things, you know the way I felt when you said that, you know it all, ever since you got here alls you've been doin is watching me right? You watch and follow me yet you don't leave the slightest sign that you were--" as I talked I wandered around the tree but she'd grasped my leg as if hugging it when I passed her.
"I watch you because I love you, and it's ok if that's not how you feel about me, but I will remain as strong and as agile as I am so do not think you have broken me!" she said biting me in my leg.
"AHH! WHAT THE HELL?" I screamed as she let go I raised a hand to back hand her.
"You wont." she said smiling, as blood dripped from her lower lip. My hand lowered as did my eyes among her body, I couldn't help it she was wanting and my soul told me I needed her.
"See, told you you wont hit me. That is the feeling of love, My Angel."
I sat down next to her without a word just looking at the other trees in the courtyard, thinking of why I felt like this toward her and why it coincided with rage. It felt like the rage was going to burst from within my soul but at the same moment I felt a feeling of warmth every time I thought about it. I couldn't focus on anything without a picture of her entering my mind for some strange reason. My head became an ailment to me suddenly, as if something was trying to present itself from the past... Memories, repressed memories. I knew the feelings I rarely got it but when the pain came I knew it.
I stood up, I felt her eyes trail me as I did, "Yes?" I asked with my back to her.
"Don't you think this place is beautiful?" she asked me, her voice sending a smile within its sound waves.
"What?" I asked her, suddenly feeling compelled to sit down again, yet my head still felt as if I was banging it up against a brick wall.
"This place." she answered grasping my hand, I turned around to look at her. The look in her eyes, NO! Stay don't leave me. But I couldn't understand why she wanted me to stay in the courtyard with her. I mean it was only a bunch of tree's, why was she so attached to them.
"I-- no, I'm leaving." I said to her, suddenly her gaze fell to the ground and then back up at me, Maybe I'll come with you? Was the new look in her eyes. She reminded me of a dog except with more of a bite than the annoying barking. I turned away from her, "Then leave already." she said as I began to step away from her, after she'd dropped my hand. I walked out of the courtyard I could feel her stare follow my every move as I held my head and wandered around the mansion venturing for one of the many rooms so I could lie down...

"Hush little baby don't say a word, Mamma's gonna buy you a mocking bird
And if that mocking---" the song suddenly stopped falling from the womans mouth as she rocked back and forth crying holding a young child. The child was covered in blood as was the front of her shirt yet she continued to rock back and forth. Was she my mother? What was she doing? Is she dying? "MOTHER!" I could hear myself cry out only for a void answer. It was a dream, or was it a memory? What's the difference?
"I love you..." she whispered, the words struck me once again as the blood seemed to grow more and more over the boy and the woman.
It was a dream, I was hurting someone who held onto me for life, I was killing her.

A cold sweat swamped everything as my eyes snapped open, I couldn't grasp a breath of air I felt as if I was suffocating. I couldn't handle it. I felt as if I was dying. A light snapped on, "Oh MY GOD! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED!!" she screamed, it was Mary, she was wearing nothing but a black bra and thong. She seemed frozen in her tracks she couldn't move nor speak, she just stare as if I was too disgusting to touch or go near. "What, WHAT IS IT!" I yelled at her but she didn't seem to her me. Suddenly she exploded into a pool of blood.

"MARY!" I exclaimed as I snatched up. Swamped in a cold sweat while wearing nothing but my boxers. She was next to me fast asleep, the moonlight was drowning the bed. It was a full moon beautiful and seeming close.
"Hmmm?" she murmured as I heard her shift along the bed. Her touch was soothing, as she rubbed my back. I turned around to look at her, she looked so beautiful in the moonlight. All of a sudden lust caught me and I found myself between deciding whether to pounce on her and fuck the shit out of her or just go back to sleep but before I knew it she was affront me and I was kissing all over her and removing her shirt. She didn't have on a bra which just made it easier, I don't think she had on any underwear. I kissed away at her neck and went down to her breasts as she was completely naked. She put her hands down on my dick, sighing in surprise as she stroked it up and down creating a giant erection. I tossed her aside onto the bed as I stood up and took off my boxers she got on all fours as I stood off the edge of the bed and she neared me. She approached me for one reason and one reason only, as she confronted me she inserted my penis into her mouth, and began sucking and blowing. It felt good, especially for a former virgin. "Mmm, Baby." I hummed. She repeated the words, and continued away with me. after awhile I felt a sudden rush through my body, I was about to cum but the she stopped and laid down on the bed with her legs spread and her knees at her tits. I crawled up on the bed and dug deep into her pushing in as far as I could do. She winced as I did, "Hurt?" I asked.
"It feels better when it hurts." she answered and I continued digging in and out of her slowly.
MMMMM...." she moaned louder and louder until it was loud shrill screams as I sped up with every scream. I was pounding in and out of her as her tits jiggled and my body was telling me it was time to explode. I was ready to pull it out and bust on her but as I tried to snatch it out she closed her legs around me and I continued.
FUCK ME HARDER!!!" she screamed, and I did exactly what she wanted me to do, I fucked her harder. The entire bed was shaking as I sped up. It was time, her toes curled as did mine and my eyes flickered to the back of my head and the first burst came from me and then another. I didn't slow down, I just continued going as she continued screaming and moaning.
BA- Baby.... i
I.... stop." she said softly as I began to slow down as the sweat from both of our bodies fell among the bed sheets. I pulled myself from her and laid on the bed next to her.
"No, you have to clean up." she said between breaths, I wasn't planning on cleaning anything up. But I did anyways because she asked me to, I was too tired though. I got up and rolled her over as I took the sheets and blankets off the bed, and threw them on the floor and I picked up my shirt, which she had on. Re-clothed her and myself, and reclaimed my place in the bed next to her. As I climbed in with her she grabbed hold of me tightly, "I love you." she whispered placing her head on my chest. "I love you too." I answered back to her without even thinking about it.

Chapter 3: Schizophrenics Best-Friend

"Listen ya little shit just run away leave us alone no one wants you here, Right Lynn?" the burly man asked my mother. I saw myself crying as I looked up at the scary man wondering how he could be my father, and then it happened again. Everything went dark, except for flashes of the man's face, years later. It was the last time he ever yelled at me, he never even saw the knife in my hand behind my back until it was deep enough in his throat to where as it was so covered with blood and meat you could no longer see it. I looked down at what happened and then at my hands they were covered in blood, I was no longer crying. My mother looked at me shocked at what I'd done and when I stepped toward her she instantly ran to the phone calling the police.
"YES, MY SON JUST KILLED HIS FATHER!! THERE'S A KNIFE IN HIS THROAT AND HE'S BLEEDING ALL OVER THE FLOOR!" she yelled into the phone, I could hear her in the other room I still stood there looking at my 9 year old hands and thinking about what happened, now that it was over I could remember it clearly. Mother didn't agree with him she said she loved me and he hit her, and my mind suddenly snapped and I'd cut him on the back of his legs and as he fell I stabbed him in the throat and then I dug it in as if trying to shove it down his throat from the outside-in.
The police busted in the house, it scared me but I didn't flinch, instead I began laughing. They were actually coming to get me, this time it was my fault and they could tell. Then there was the same officer as before.
"Ma'am, are you sure it was this child?" he asked Mother.
"I'll kill you too." I looked up smiling and pointing at her.
"Come on son you don't mean that..... Do you?" he looked confused.
"I TOLD YOU, HE'S A DEMON BOY!!" she yelled again, and I took two steps toward her and she ran into the kitchen. The officers all drew there guns, I smiled again and went over to my dead Dad and sat down next to his head.
"How you feelin'?" I asked him not waiting for a response, "I'm gonna need that back now." I said digging my hand back into his neck and pulling the knife from him.
It felt like a bee stinging me in the back. I fell over fowards.....

I stood in the shower my head hung, left hand on the wall the water scorching my back and neck.
"Damien, I think we should go out tonight." I could hear Mary say from the opposite side of the door. I honestly didn't like going out into society at least not around here, everyone knew what I had done and didn't like me coming around but I guess had been couped up here for a long time, "Alright." I said turning off the shower with my right hand. I still stood there awhile...

"He's mentally imbalanced and always will be, he needs to seclude himself so letting him out into society isn't---"

"Yea, right Doc." I said to myself as I got out of the shower and wiped the fog from the mirror and thought about what I saw in the mirror, I heard the door peer open from behind me. "Nothing in here for you Art." I said and the door quickly shut.
"Damn kids these days." I said to myself and retrieved my knife from the cabinet next to the toilet and shower. I sprayed on some shaving cream and hacked away at the hair on my face all without breaking the focus on my eyes. They seemed to hold all kinds of secrets but none of which were necessarily that important to me. She blasted the door open, "Ready for round three?" I asked her catching her off guard. She laughed a little, "No that's later, but I don't know what you'd usua--"
"Yes you do the only thing you do is watch me." I interrupted her.
"Ok, I've never seen you go shopping."
"Because I don't"
"Then how do you go get food?"
"Send Art to the store." in the distance "Yes sir
"Ok, a little strange but it gets things done."
"Of course, now I'm naked so can you close the door.
"I wanna see you naked."
"Every time you do, you get horny and wet so why would I do that right now?"
"Because you love me and you know it."
I quickly turned around and snatched her up close to me, placing the knife over her neck. She didn't even flinch. "Normally I'd kill you for not flinching but I can't, because I love you." I said kissing her neck and releasing her so I could finish shaving.
"I'm not gonna leave just be cause you said I'm gonna get horny, I know you're gonna take something off." She said.
"You're right, I was gonna take off my shirt." I said relieving myself from my shirt and continuing shaving again.
Awhile passed and I finished shaving but I still remained in the bathroom because I knew she was staring at me from the edge of the bathtub.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing you know I love you right?"
"Yeah, more than you let me know but at the same time I know because you're too much like a book to me."
"So you sit there and read me?"
"So what am I thinking?"
"You wanna know why and how I got all those girls."
"Yeah but I'm not gonna ask."
"Well I get theme from Mr. Errand Boy."
"Art brings you women."
"Only when I ask."
"Why didn't--"
"Because then I'd have no use for you."
"What are you talking about you don't even know what I was gonna say."
I stepped toward her she put her hands on my abs.
"Two-- four-- six--eight."
"You like?"
"Of course."
"I wasn't talking about them I was talkin about--"
"Just hurry up and do it."
I put my right foot up on th edge of the bathtub next to her and pulled my knife from the belt on my ankle and cut off her shirt and bra. Her tits seemed to jump out at me as she leaned back along the tub. She put her hands together above her head. I looked at her for a minuet, she reminded me of someone I'd known when I was younger. I disregarded it and flipped my knife around, the blade toward me and the flat side; I slid among her body starting between her tits and down to the top of her vagina very slowly. She smiled as her eyes were closed and her body jumped forward toward me. I dropped the knife on her as Art burst through the bathroom door, "Yes?" I asked.
"ummm.... never mind." Art said leaving the bathroom. I stood up and left the bathroom leaving her shirtless and I wandered into the kitchen where there was a man sitting at my table.
"What the fuck do you want?" I asked stunned that another man was in my house.
"No, hello?" the man said.
"No, you can get a goodbye though."
"DADDY!" Mary burst into the kitchen.
"Why are you here?" she asked after giving him a hug I didn't like his presence so I left the kitchen. I went back into the courtyard, after getting my knife from the bathroom, wondering why her father didn't say anything about her not being dressed for the occasion. I still wanted to know why I couldn't sleep and why she was my every thought and why she reminded me of someone from my childhood. Why was there this gigantic piece missing from my memory?
'Why was there a piece that only seemed to come back when Mary was around?' I thought to myself, 'What the hell does she have to do with me? Why should she have to be in my head so often?' I laid my head against a tree after digging my knife into the ground with a great thrust. I looked up into the sky until I drifted off into a great slumber......

'....... Dark....... Hellish hot, crimson strewn walls......... Mary?............... Dead? Who killed her?.......
There was a man standing over her body, was it me? I couldn't see anything...... It went black...... what was going on?'

A sudden presence wakened me, I snatched my knife out of the ground and was ready to fight who ever it was.
"See Daddy, this is my boyfriend!" Mary said smiling. I relaxed once I realized it was them, with the exception of her father.
"Boy friend?" her father and I questioned at the same time.
"Well, aren't you?" she asked, her mood once again dropping.
"I don't know." I answered my eyes never leaving her father as I placed my knife back into the sheath on my belt.
"What do you mean, you don't know?" Her and her father both said sounding surprised, "But... you love me too don't you?" she asked me I knew this time she expected an answer.
"You're always in my head, and I in my dreams. I don't think I can go without thinking about you, you're always there." I said to her, not breaking focus from her father.
"Young man I'd appreciate it if you stopped staring at me like you're going to kill me." her father said.
"Why?" I asked him.
"Because if you;re going to be with my daughter don't you need to make a good impression on me?" he answered smiling, and stroking his chin.
"Depends on the impression you want from me." I said smiling and pulling my knife back out, the smile on her father's face dropping down as low as her mood.
"Mary, this is indespicable you cannot be with this man."
"But Daddy why can't I be with him, he makes me happy. He treats me right, and is really good with his... Well never mind you get the point." she argued, her fathers face turned beat red with that remark and he seemed disgusted as he walked away shaking his head and mumbling over and over again, "... what have I done wrong..."
She waited for her father to complete leave us alone, and she jumped on me, "Baby, baby, I think we should get married!"
"WHY? Your father hates me!"
"Kill him." she said, my eyes widened and I met her with a deathly satisfaction.
"I love you," the words seemed to slip out, "I mean... Well, whatever." I said kissing her neck over and over, "I'm glad you decided to put on a shirt but now it's just harder to get into it."
"Well you'e not getting in it anyways." she said pushing away from me with a smile.
"And why is that?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow and putting my knife in the back pocket of my pants, I could feel it cutting into my pants. I stared at her for a second as she didn't answer me I could see that she was secnd guessing herself as she thought about what she was going to say.
"Don't second guess yourself, if there's something that you have to say then say it." I said cutting her off.
"Well, I figured we'd go out tonight. I mean it's kinda strange how you have four cars that have never been used and you live in the most exciting part of the city and have never gone out to see anything."
After awhile she answered,"Well, unless you don't want to."
"Well I feel obligated to do what you want to do,but at the sametime I know that if you were anyone else that I'd probably say to hell with it and kill you, but I... Well I just can't do that to you." I turned around, and began to walk away. She joined me a few moments later.
"Why what?"
"Why can't you just kill me and let everything go like u do with every other girl you sleep with?"
"Becuase there are certain things that I'd miss."
"Like what?"
"Like... your eyes or the look you get when I ignore you or get mad at you or when your scared but most of all I'd miss the sheer beauty of a real woman and the smile that crosses your face that just seems to calm a vengeful beast inside of me." I didn't even look at her just kept walking, through the arch way and through the halls of the great house.
"Do I really mean that much to you?"
"Hmmm." I forgot that I had said that aloud.
"I really mean that much?"
"Why else would I have kept you around? I mean come one you've been here for about three months and for the past three days you'vebeen mine but it seems like you've been there for a whole life time."
"Yeah, even when you weren't mine you till stood in the shadows and watched and waited. Just because I ignored you doesn't mean I didn'[t know you were there."
"So you deliberatly casted me away?" she stopped walking but I didn't.
"No, I just never took the time to look atchu until you forced me to stand there and watch you."
I stopped but didn't turn around, just retrieved the knife from my pocket.
"How could you? Couldn't you tell how many tears were shed for you? I've always loved you, and now all of a sudden you--." she stopped as I turned around to face her.The look on her face wasn't fear but sympathy, an emotion I'd forgotten about.
"What is this?" I asked.
"What is what?" she asked as the waterfalls of pain streamed down her face.
"This feeling--" she interuppted me and for once I wasn;t angry buit at the sametime I didn't know what the hell the problem was. I couldn't bring myself to say anything I knew it was wrong to play with her emotions but at the sametime I knew I didn't care.
"you should feel stupid and guilty!" She screamed at the top of her lungs as she ran passed me pushing me away as I reached out to her. I Stood there a moment watching her run down the hall, it was like I could do nothing..... for the first time I actually felt.... human.

Chapter 4: HUMAN

I stood in the shower, head hung, leaning on the wall. Thinking about the previous day, 'She just left me there and ran away... She looked so hurt and sad like I had just crushed her entire world. What exactly had I done?' I thought as I watched the water circle around the drain and the steam rise from the growing hotter water. I could hear the door knob being messed with, then came a knock. I couild tell that it wasn't Art, which meant it could only be one other person,"Hold on." i said, sounding not like violent rugged self.
"I turned off the shower and grabbed a towel from the white metal rack that was on the back of the door, wrapping myself in it. I nlocked the door and cracked it open yet I didn't look her in the face I looked down at the floor feeling like I was unworthy of looking upon her.
"Do you really love me?" she asked me as straight forward as possible. I didn't know how to answer the question so I just looked at her as she stared back awaiting her answer, yet none came.
"If you don't love me tell me now because then I wont waist my time on trying to keep you here with me." her attitude getting worse with my silence. She turned to walk away and I swung the door open and grabbed her hand. I didn't turn her around, but held her firmly yet soft enough not to hurt her.
"I... can't define this feeling, I odn't know what it is but I've never felt it before and you are the only person besides I think my mother to ever make me feel like this." i said with my head hung I felt her turn around as I let her go. I stood up straight as my eyes felt strange as if something was overwhelming them. She came to me and lifted my head up by my chin, making me feel like a little child.
"I'll love you with all my heart until the end of time." she said and I felt a reminding feeling, of the tear falling down my cheek.
"I love you too." I repeated without thinking, but remembering my mother. I couldn't help it but I grabbed her waist and pulled her to me and then to the floor as I joined her and began making love to her.
felt her trying to gather herself as she laid her head on my chest and her arm across me. She drifted off to sleep as her breath slowed from deep and elongated to calm and subtle. I laid there with my arm around her looking up at the high ceiling. I couldn't put a finger on anything, it was like everything had changed. Honestly I didn't like it, I wanted everything to go back to how it was but at the same time I didn't want to lose her.

Shit, why can't everything just be normal, fuckin' normalcy! I thought...

....A crash came from the other end of the hall, down by the kitchen. I listened, waiting for someone to come down the hall, there was only footsteps. Then I saw him, I quickly stood up dropping Mary. She woke up and I stood her up pulling her and our clothes into the bathroom. I stood her in the shower.

"What's going on?" Mary asked holding the side of her face that hit the floor. I didn't answer her, alls I could do was look at her. For the first time in a long time I was AFRAID...

Part II
Chapter 5: New beginning

I pulled my gaze from her as I could hear the ring of footsteps outside the closed and locked bathroom door.
I snatched a knife from the medicine cabinet and pressed my ear against the door. I could hear them mumbling outside the door. I dropped to the floor and peeked under neath the door and saw numerous pairs of feet all with black boots. Suddenly there was a bang at the door and my fear was exchanged with Mary's confidence as she held on to my and squeeze her naked body against mine as if asking me to protect her. I stood affront her firmly standing ground waiting for them to burst through the door, I felt the same rush of anger I was used to and everything was normal. I pushed her off of me as they blasted through the door pointing their guns. I swung away with my knife like a crazed fighter. I was within minuets that I'd killed nearly all of them. Moments later, after shooting me in the left thigh twice the right thigh my left shin both feet my right shoulder twice and my hands, they threw there guns down and tackled me to the floor. Four of them, they sat, laid and stood on me. A nother of them came in with out his helmet, his face seemed familiar especially that scar on the side of his face. I struggled to get up but as I watched him take Mary all the pain shot back at me, yet I still tried to get up. I clenched my hand around th hilt of the knife as one of them stood on my hand. I pulled it to me cutting my chest. I closed my eyes and remembered something my father once told me that angered me enough to want to kill him, my eyes snapped open and I shot up beneath all the men and lashed out at the man that had Mary.... Everything went hazy, yet I continued to fight.....
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