Bar Variation | By: Joseph Schlegel | | Category: Short Story - Long Joke Bookmark and Share

Bar Variation

Two guys were in a bar discussing politics.
The one guy said to the other, "I think that, politically speaking, chocolate is the number one commodity of any society, modern or prehistoric."
The other guy responded, "I think you're an idiot."
"Politically speaking?"
"Of course."
And they continued discussing politics for quite some time.

Meanwhile, out in the West, two cowboys were fighting.
"I said I wanted to rope the cattle! Why don't you ever let me do anything important?"
"Because I hate you, I reckon."
"Politically speaking?"
"Of course not. We're cowboys: we hate politics."
"I hate you."
And they continued fighting for quite some time.

At the same time, far under the sea, a lobster and a fish were observing a scuba diver.
"He looks like he's enjoying himself. I wonder why he doesn't just stay down here forever," the fish said.
"Because he can't breathe without oxygen ... he'd die," the lobster responded.
"But he likes it so much. At least he'd die with a smile on his face."
And while they continue wondering about the scuba diver's ability to dwell under the sea, I pose this question to you:

What do these three events - the two guys discussing politics in a bar, the fighting cowboys in the West, and the fish and lobster discussion under the sea - have to do with each other?
What if I told you that the scuba diver was contemplating a career in politics?
What if I told you that he didn't notice the lobster or the fish, but he did notice the fighting cowboys?
And finally, what if I let you know that shortly after the two guys in the bar finished their discussion on politics, a scuba man rushed in and shot them both in the head, leaving them to rot in the vacant bar of the previously populated city of New York?
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