lost in your own mind | By: stephanie brown | | Category: Short Story - Death Bookmark and Share

lost in your own mind

Lost in your own mind
She was laid there unable to speak, move or think.
Emma sat by her mums side as they tried waking her up from a 2 month coma, again it was just disappointment tears strolled down her face. Her mums skin was blanched and rough. All her mind kept saying was,only if her mum hadn't of gone to that stupid concert then she wouldn't have ended up in that car crash.
Emma left as she was a fittness trainer and had to take a group. The whole jeourney she was incoherent . As she arrived a group of women sat chatting.
"right come on you lot" shouted Emma as the sleepy group responded slowly, so she blew the  whistle that hung around her neck, that soon got there attention. It felt like there eyes were piercing through her and ripping her insides out.
She began instructing them with a workout plan as her phone rang,
"Hello is this Emma Hudderson?" "yes....yes it is"                                         " Hello I'm Doctor Anderson from Amerdus hospital in calling regarding your mother".                                            "is she okay".                                         "she's doing well and responding to our calls I advise you to get down here so we can see if she recognises you".         "okay ill be straight down"
With that she hung up the phone and left without an explanation. Emma called a cab, she impatiently awaited the it to come.
She ran ward to ward till she found her mothers room. Inside doctors awaited doing checks every five minutes making sure she was responding.
Emma sat for a little while till her mum woke up. "mum"
"do... (cough) do I know you"
"mum its me why don't you remember me" Emma said filling up,
"Emma you must rember that your mother sustained quite alot of injuries she might not remember anyone.
She ran out of the room crying, she sat in the canteen withdrawn from the world. Her mind was blank and her eyes were like rivers. A tall handsome  bloke stood in front of her.
"may I?"
"yeah feel free"
Emma wiped away her tears, and sat up.
"im john I work here I don't mean to get involved but is your mum okay?"
"umm..." She didn't know how to respond "yeah she's okay"
" I've gotta go now".
Emma walked around for about an hour then it came to her attention that she should go back up and try talking to her mother about when she was younger and all the fun they had together.
Emma got up there as loads of doctors piled into her mothers room. She pushed through to get in as her mother laied yet again doing nothing.
"what's happened, why isn't she moving."
"Emma it seems your mum just had an epileptic fit"
She gasped with horror.
"will she be okay, what's going to happen now"
" we will have to run some more test on your mother to find a solution".
The doctors left the room, Emma sat perched on the window ledge her hands shaking at the thought of her mother waking up and not even knowing her.
She dosed off for a few minutes as she received a text,
'Need you at work asap'
She knew she had to go but she didn't want to really, she stood out side the hospital and hailed a cab.
She sat clutching a picture of her mother and her, it was one of her main memory's of her mum she bad left.
She arrived at a colossal building that sat in middle of no where. She entered with a thud, she had fell to the floor unconscious. She woke back up at the hospital.
"Ahh Ms Hudderson your awake".
" Doctor Anderson, what....what's going on why am I here?"
There was a long pause as he sat on the bottom of the bed,
"Emma you collapsed due to lack of sleep you really should try to knodd of when you can"
" I just cant stop thinking of my mother."
" well I can prescribe you some sleeping tablets if you'd like?"
She knodded sharply and turned onto her side. Her hands drenched from all the crying she was doing.
Hours passed and the doctor gave her the pills and sent her home. She took one and went upstairs to lay in bed.
The sun rose as Emma once again got ready to venture to the hospital. She decided to take the bus, the bus was packed as everyone chatters and sniggered. Emma stood staring out of the misted window wondering if her mother would ever remember her.
She got to the hospital, the doctors greeted her as she went into her mothers room.
"who are you"
"I'm your daughter"
"I don't remember....who am I?"
Emma felt herself filling up but she knew she had to be strong for her mum.
" your name is Harriet Hudderson your 43 years old and you have 2 children and you have an amazing life"
" that does sound quite amazing but I really don't know you" with that she turned away. Emma went to talk to Dr. Anderson.
"what are we going to do she doesn't
even know who she is?"
" we have to give her time to think into things do you have photo albums, videos or memory boxes?"
" yeah we have"
"go get them they may help jog her memory"
Emma rushed out of the hospital. She ran to the bus station waiting for a bus to her home. She got off the bus down the road and walked up to the house.
She had to search through piles and piles of stuff.
Eventually, she came across a dusty cobwebbed book. She blew the dust off and opened it, there's was pictures of her her mum and the family. She really thought there was hope.
Emma rang a cab and got straight back to the hospital. She got to her mums room and showed her the photo albums. She didn't take any notice she stared at the wall. Emma slumped in the chair and lost all hope.
"Emma wake up... Emma"
Emma was rudely awaken by Doctor Anderson
"you should really go home well ring you if there's any change" with that she went home.
Emma woke up to her phone continuously ringing.
"Emma its about your mum... There no easy way  to say this but your mum ran off last night and got hit by a car, there could be a chance that she's paralysed"
Emma was speechless,
"wha...bu....ok ill come straight down"
Emma sped down stairs smashing her head against the wall. The cab arrived out side the hospital as Doctor Anderson  waited for her.
"how did she even get out "
"We don't know."
They walked up to the room . Emma sat next to her holding her hand.
"Emma there's some things you need to be ready for, your mum could be paralysed, she could be really confused or she could be brain damaged. I know its alot to take in."
Emma was so shocked she just. Wanted it to be a bad dream and for her to wake up in her mothers arms, she wanted to help her mum but there was nothing she could do.
She covered her mother up with a small blanket and kissed her on the forehead.
"maybe today I loose my mum"
She slowly walked out of the room promising herself she wasn't going to come back till she want rung up.
A few weeks later, Emma revived a phone call.
"Emma this is Doctor Anderson here, your mum is having tests but I advise you to come see her."
Emma laughed
" its pointless she doesn't know who I am anymore and frankly I don't know here anymore".
Emma hung up. She broke down crying, all she wanted was her mum back but she knew it wasn't going to happen. She rang up daily checking on her mother but it all stayed the same what was she going go do?
Emma plucked up her courage as her mum was being discharged in to her care. After 8 months of hell she was finally going home.
"Emma remember bring her back if anything changes."
" I will thank you for all your help."
Unfortunately, her mum was paralysed so she was in a wheel chair.
She still had a pale complexion and her hair was messy. Emma took her home and got her settled down. Emma had the house reconstructed so Harriet's bedroom was down stairs.
She constantly checked her mum was ok.
Emma still had to go to work so a day nurse came out.
She go t to work and no one was there, a shriek haunted the alleyways and Emma ran as fast as she could falling and banging her head.
She woke up laying on the floor as people hovered around her. The sun glistened in her eyes and her head began pounding.
"are you alright love"
Sitting up slowly she replied,
"yeah I'm fine"
Emma stood up and sluggishly walked down the hill peering over her shoulder. She was physically shaking.
Emma arrived outside her home as people rushed in and out.
"is every thing okay?"
"yes infact its very good your mother is remembering small things, she said she remembers a dog called Goldie"
Emma shrieked with excitement!!
She trotted thorough the house and ensconced next to her mum. Her mum slept most of the evening but Emma didn't want to wake her up nor let her sleep. She must have dosed off for a few minutes.
"ahhh help me"
"MUM what's wrong?"
Harriet sat uncomfortably sobbing in pain.
Emma took her off to the hospital, her heart was in her mouth and her for palms was sweaty.
She sat awaiting the news,
"Emma we have to rush your mother off to surgery it seems she has an internal bleed"
With that he ran off.
Emma felt alone, like there was no one left in her life and no one cared.
Her heart had broken and eyes were uncontrollable.
Hours had passed as Dr.Anderson came to break her the devastating news.
"Emma Im afraid your mother is very ill and there may be nothing we can do"
She froze, it was like her heart stopped beating and she gasped for breath.
"you have to do something no she cant die" she was crying that much her words were not understandable.
She peered round the door of her mothers room and her mother laied doing nothing. Emma sat crying loosing her mum was going to be the hardest thing ever, she was going to have to contact her family in America. How she was going to plan a funeral she didn't know. She sobbed and sobbed and sobbed.
"Emma its late you should go home if anything happens we will let you know,"
She left the hospital, it felt like she'd been hit by a truck. The bus ride was the hardest seeing all the kids with their parents and teenagers pushing past her fighting over seats.
Finally she was home and jumped into her mums bed. She didn't understand anything.
Morning arrived and she went off to the hospital, the room her mother once slept in was occupied with someone different.
"were is my mother"
"we put her somewhere quitter"
She followed the doctors up to ward B17. It was so peaceful and her mum laied with wires sticking out of her. The sun went down and Emma when home.
Emma was awoke at 3am the next morning with the horrifying news that her mother had passed. The day had actually come. The most upsetting thing was before she did she didn't even know who Emma was.
Emma decided to take an early flight to America, she had already notified the family and they were all devastated. She had her mothers body transported to America too.
She packed a few essentials and headed to the airport.she sat alone waiting for her plane,the last time she came to America her mother was with her.  The plane landed into the departure, slowly she strode through the airport and over to the plane. The plane ride was rough and She didn't feel so well, turbulence was the worse
The plane finally landed in America and her uncle greeted her and took her home."if you need anything hun let me know" she knodded and when up stairs. She woke up and went for a stroll, the beach was beautiful, her mum would take her when she was younger, shed show her the sights and the amazing features. She soon had to go back because it began getting cold. Emma took a long walk home she needed to clear her head, life was malicious putting us on earth with people we love then taking them away from us how unfair is that she got home and tried getting upstairs without fuss. "are you going to be okay tomorrow"
Emma stuttered and couldn't get her words out. Speedily she ran upstairs. morning came and the household left in groups pilling into black cars. Emma wanted to explode. They arrived as the car carrying he coffin parked up.
"Were here today to remember a lovely woman with a large heart and a big family, sadly she passed away in the name of god and in her spirit I wish she rest in peace" "amen"
Everyone sobbingly agreed "Amen".
Soon enough her mother was buried. The wake was beautiful white roses scattered around and pictures of her mother were placed on the walls her favourite song was played and people danced,cried and sobbed.
 Emma got drunk she didn't really know how to cope with the grief it was eating her up inside. She had a pounding headache the morning after.
Before her uncle woke up she crept out of the house and into the coffee shop on the corner. She sat oblivious to everything around her. Nothing would ever be the same again. A guy sat across the coffee shop starring into Emma's eyes. He had dark brown hair and he was beautiful, she saw a twinkle in his eye as he got up and left. The only person she had left in life was her uncle. That wasn't good enough.
Her heart had broken and her life was ruined, will she ever be happy again?

                  Framed for It
Sirens blazed as Jayden was carted away. He was innocent  but being blamed for such a tragedy. They ragged him round as if he was a rag doll and rushed him to a police cell,       "I'm PC.Duggings and this is my colleague Officer.Andrews".                      "tell me where were you between the time of 10pm and 12pm last night?"    Jayden looks terrified.                                      "I was at home".                                                the officers stared each other in the eye. "what happens?".                                    "somebody broke in my wife began screaming so the guy lashed out took my gun off the table and shot her".         "But you were found with the gun in your hand and her blood all over you" Jayden began sobbing.  "Do you not have any respect my wife just died and your in here questioning me when you should be looking for the real killer."
"interview terminated at 10:47" we will keep you in custody until the chief makes a decision." Jamie sat in a cold cell drunk people screaming around him, he had no time to grief as the police were framing him for some imperticula reason. Hours must have passed and Jayden was told he'd be peering in court on Monday. The flashlight glistened in his eye as the bars of his cell were slammed shut.
"Jayden your transport to court is here". He was accompanied by 10 armed officers and taken out of the building into a police van.
They arrived at court and people shouted horrible things as Jayden entered. "All rise" Jayden watched as the judge gave him a malicious glare and slowly sat comfortably.
"Are you Mr. Jayden Barnet Smith".             "Yes your honour".                                        "Please do tell the court the event of that night".                                                         "well me and my wife were having a romantic meal as a guy dresses in black smashed through the patio doors pointing a gun at us, we managed to run and barricade ourselves into the bedroom but they were more and they came through the window, claret began screaming so they picked my gun up off the table and they.....they" Jayden began filling up. "please do continue Mr. Smith".       "they shot her with my gun".                         "the gun has your DNA on it why would that be?"                                               "well I grabbed it out of the kitchen draw to shoot them.".                                       "may I ask why do you keep a firearm in your kitchen draw?".                                Jayden stuttered. Court went on for hours, "I want you remanded in custody until your sentencing Wednesday, that all for today". He was rushed down the stairs and into another cell.
Morning approached, Jayden say dwelling on that day how he could have stopped her dying.
Wednesday came quicker than he'd hoped, the jury all sat down as the judge re-enters the room.                              "All rise".                                                     The barrister began talking                                                              "Jamie for the jury's information who's gun was it that killed your wife?".                                                             "mine".                                                  "and it wasn't you that shot her".              "no your ".                                          "where is it you keep a firearm in you house".                                                            "the kitchen draw".                                     "no thurther questions your honour".     
"Jayden with the evidence provided I sentence you to 6 months imprisonment" "bailiff take him away".
Jayden was dragged down and put into a cell. It was like he didn't exist anymore. His pale dry skin scraped against the floor as he fell off his bunker. He mainly kept himself to himself. The 8 months flew by and before he knew it he was out into the open air. People crowded outside the prison shouting horrible stuff as he was escorted back to his home.
Finally, he was back with his home comforts. Jayden felt desolate, no family left and no one. There's was no chance of him finding love. Maybe he should move away.jjjjjjj
Jayden's decision was to move to new York and make a new life. He didn't hang around he straight away orders a removal van you get all his belongings and book flights to America. His flight lasted around 14 hours.  He arrived at the airport as he was picked up by the removal van and dropped off at his new house. It was shabby and kneaded alot of work doing to it. The doors were off there hinges and the place was unhygienic the house was falling apart.
Everything was put in its place and organized in a specific way. The first night was horrible the moon light shone through the window into his eyes. He awoke and when into the bathroom his pale skin reflecting through the mirror and his yellow stained teeth. He when out to town. He needed clothes,shoes and household items. He ventured round town people engaged conversation with him. For once he was somebody.
After a few weeks, the house was in  immaculate condition. The next stage is his new life would be to find love, even though there's still a chance he'd be recognised, he got all dressed up and when out to the bar. Ladies pranced around him. Only one woman caught his eye he urged to know her name, she had beautiful blonde hair waived around and her Georges blue eyes lit up the dance floor like a disco ball. The background music set a perfect scene for him to introduce himself. She sat next to him at the bar.
"Red whine please" her voice was a soothing sound.                                                 "let me buy you a drink".                              she smiled at him.                                          "I'm..." He couldn't revel his real identity,                                                            "I'm Alex".                                                       "nice to meet you Alex, I'm Layla if its love your looking for I'm taken but my friends are single" she pointed behind her and there stood three smallish brunettes.                                                        "I'm taken too I'm just being polite".          "good, cheers for the drink".                       Jayden had a disappointed look and left the bar. He began strolling home as people stared at him as if he was an alien just arrived on earth. He arrived home. He was distraught no one would ever love him or care for him again. He slept off the beer and sat in bed.  The last time his life fell apart his wife was there to pick up the peace's but this time no one was there but his once grotty house. Jayden decided to follow his dream and become an author. It had been his dream since he was a little boy.
Monday morning approached and he went back into town the nearest book publishing company but that fell through he had no id, well he did but for his identity of Jayden, he wanted to go under the name of Alex.
He tried all sort of jobs but they all fell through. He sat at home pessimistic, he believed nothing would ever work out he had no income and no way to buy food he was living off tined food. He decided he had enough of life and was going to join the army.
A few weeks passed and he continued in the army. Himself and the other lad were sat gossiping when a grenade flew over the wall Jayden told the boys to run and sacrificed himself by jumping on top of it. Bits of him flew all over.

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