Iced Beneath
From the records of Dr. Gregory Remis
Date: April 15th 1932 - 0900hrs
Patient: Hilary Cordrey - Aged 44
Patient has successfully overcome her fear of ice (with reference to April 8th), although slow progress is being made to recover any recollection of the night which initiated her deterioration into her, and here I quote Miss.Cordrey herself, "State of All-knowing".
All of which she endured twenty years ago to this very day, and here I account the following, taken from the recordings of her appointment today.
Gregory Remis: So, Hilary, tell me why you are flustered.
Hilary Cordrey: Doctor, it is twenty years since the sinking of the Titanic.
GR: Yes, of that I am aware.
HC: Last night - this morning - I awoke from The Nightmare.
GR: Your dream of watching Titanic sink?
HC: Yes. Also hearing both my parents screaming as they are pulled away by the rushing waters. Although...
GR: Yes?
HC: There was more to it.
GR: More to your survival, or the dream itself?
HC: Aren’t you supposed to tell me that, Doctor?
GR: Carry on, Hilary, please.
HC: I awoke, hearing a voice, whispering to me from the shadows. A hollow, dead-kind of voice. Slow and pained.
GR: And what did this voice say?
HC: It was an echo, something half-remembered before the great ship struck that iceberg. It was a voice from that night. That cold, cold night.
GR: Please, go on Hilary.
HC: I know, finally after twenty years of knowing nothing, that my State of All-knowing is due to the voice that I heard last night.
GR: Tell me, what did this voice say to you?
HC: It was not directed to me at all, Doctor. As I said, it was a captured memory of the thoughts that I received whilst I lay with the fever upon my bunk, in the cabin on Titanic, twenty whole years ago.
GR: And what were these thoughts that you received, Hilary?
HC: Exactly this, for I can still hear them over and over again, Doctor, echoing -
"I lay here... Beneath these waves, and what am I? Am I an Angel, darkened by my Sins of the past? Yes, a banished Angel from the brilliance of Heaven, that is what I exist as... Trapped within a spiritual existence, bound by these four tight walls of cold ice. Ice that does not thaw, indeed, it cannot... Ever! For it acts as my prison.
"I am Fallen!
"As I float in the ocean, suspended like the fool that I am, I can view each lonely star of the sky.
"I am a star such as those above, suspended aimlessly, tortured to live eternal...
"This ice surrounding me, I feel it pulsing and reshaping as always, constantly reaching up and outwards, long protrusions of dangerous ice...
"And written above me upon the huge bulk of some monstrous construction, I read the words TITAN, as they block out my view of the stars..."
Appointment ceased at 0941hrs.
