So Wrong So Right
SO WRONG SO RIGHT
I met an angel. She helped shape my world. She became the very air I breath.
She was standing in my doorway.
Golden locks cascaded gently over her delicate shoulders.
Her eyes were like large tropical pools beckoning me to dive in.
She must have been an angel. No mortal could ever be so lovely.
Before this meeting I wanted nothing to do with her. Now, like early morning mist my dastardly plan to chase her away dissipated. How could I ever think of turning away such a beautiful creature?
She should be welcomed in and tended to hand and foot lest she might leave and that would be tragic.
Dad was correct in bringing her home to meet me. She could make him a complete man again, something he hadn’t been since we lost Mom nine years before.
Dad had finally found a lady who would even consider taking on a pre-teen in spite of the fact that at twenty two, she was almost a child herself.
My heart raced as this lovely being introduced herself to me.
“Hello,” she said. “I’m Connie. You must be Greg. I’ve heard so much about you that I feel I already know you.”
She leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. I was mesmerized. Little did she know that right then and there she sealed my fate. I was smitten with a love that would never die.
“Dad, if you don’t marry her soon, I will!” I warned him after she’d left for the night. His chuckle couldn’t dispel the fact that I was dead serious.
Dad and Connie were married the next month.
What was I going to do having such a beautiful lady living under my roof? I didn’t even know what love was yet I was in deep. I wanted to explode. I was confused. I decided that it was best for me to bury these feelings and simply enjoy the fact that an angel was going to be living with us. I would have to keep my burning love locked away deep inside.
As beautiful as Connie was on the outside, she proved to be even more so on the inside. If ever there was a woman that had it all, beauty, brains and a loving, caring disposition, it was she. There wasn’t a selfish bone in her body. Everything she did, she did for Dad and I. Connie was a gem. No matter what the situation, girl problems, guy problems, school problems, sports, pimples, you name it, I could always turn to her and she was there for me. Of course, my one big problem I could never share with her. I could never let her know that I loved her more than anything in this world. That secret love would be my prison for all time.
Connie and I became best friends. We went everywhere together. The better I got to know her, the stronger my love grew. My childish fantasies about her were slowly being replaced with conceptions of true love. She taught me what true love was all about. It’s about caring and sharing, more giving and less taking. That was Connie. Connie was love.
With her help, my high school years were a breeze. But leaving home… and her… for four hard years of college was the pits. After graduation I got my own apartment and a job at Dad’s architectural firm. All was going well and my love for Connie remained my secret. Then our lives changed drastically.
One cold and rainy day that winter, my office phone rang. Although I knew who it was, I barely recognized the frightened voice on the other end.
“What is it Connie?” I asked. “What is wrong?”
“Oh Greg!” she cried, “The hospital called. There’s been an accident! They told me to come down there right away. It’s your father Greg. He’s been in an accident! Please help me Greg. I can‘t drive. I’m frantic!”
“OK Connie I’ll be right there.”
I rushed over to the old house where she was waiting in a frenzy. I put her in the car and raced to the hospital. We ran inside and headed for the emergency ward. A doctor met us in the hall. His solemn demeanor told the grim news without a word, yet he spoke,
“I’m sorry Mrs. Jannick” he said looking at Connie. “Your husband didn’t have a chance. For what it’s worth, I can tell you that he didn’t suffer. The paramedics said it was instant.”
Connie passed out at the news. She was devastated. After years of marital bliss, the love of her life was gone.
There was a large turnout at the funeral. All of Dad’s clients as well as his entire staff showed up to extend their condolences.
Afterwards, I escorted Connie back home to the historic manor where she had spent the last ten years with Dad and I.
“Greg, I can’t bear the thought of being alone in this old house.” she confided. “I’ll go crazy here all alone. Do you think you could stay here with me for a short while till I can cope on my own?”
I didn’t have to think. I took two weeks vacation and moved back into my old room. I stayed with her day and night. I did my best to keep her occupied. I took her for rides in the car and we would sit and talk sometimes late into the night. She was afraid to go to sleep so some nights we just stayed up talking. After several days, she was able to muster a laugh or two at something corny I might say. I held her close and said,
“We’re going to get through this Mom, you’ll see. I’m not going to leave you alone until we do.”
I had never called her ‘Mom’ in the years I had known her even though I believe she’d have preferred me to.
“I like that,” she said softly. “I thought I’d never hear anyone call me mom.”
“Well you deserve it Connie. I never really thought of you as my mom. I’ve always considered you my best friend. You were always there for me no matter what and you always did the mom things for me so if it makes you feel better, from now on I’ll call you Mom.”
I stayed at the old house for quite a while longer. There were times when I would wake in the night to the sound of her crying in the next room. I told her that she could wake me anytime she needed and that she shouldn’t cry alone. She took me up on the offer and the next night I met her in the hallway for a consoling embrace. We then went to the kitchen for a cup of tea.
“I want to thank you Greg for being here for me.” she said earnestly. “I don’t know what I would have done without you. This has been so difficult.”
“Neither of us should be alone right now Mom,” I replied. “Besides, it’s the least I could do. I could never repay you for all you’ve done for me. I’ll always be here when you need me.”
A Needed Break
It was approaching one year since the accident. Another cold winter was setting in. The sad memories were bearing down on both of us like a plague. I feared that Connie was headed for a bout of depression so I made a suggestion.
“Mom,” I said, “Why don’t we get away for a while, somewhere different. I think we need a change of scenery.”
“I think so too.” she said solemnly. “But where could we go?”
“How about Colorado?” I offered, “Maybe we can do some skiing.”
“But I haven’t skied in years,” she confessed.
“It‘s like riding a bike, Mom” I replied, “I’ll help you.”
She agreed so I took a three week vacation and we headed west. Colorado was beautiful, the white snow, the dry climate. The cold dry air beat the frigid damp New England winter hands down. All in all the trip was wonderful. I helped Connie re-learn what she’d forgotten. This required holding her tight and although it was a tough job….I was happy to do it. I held her hand as she teetered and screamed all the way down the beginners slope. We collided at the bottom and ended up rolling several yards together in the snow. When we finally stopped she was on top of me. She gently brushed the snow away from my face. We were laughing hysterically.
“I feel like a kid again.” she quipped.
“As our laughter subsided we laid there softly smiling at each other. For the first time in our lives, we had a ‘moment.’
“This was a great idea Greg. Thanks for bringing me here. I needed this,” she said.
Connie was as lovely now if not more so then the day I first saw her standing like an angel in my doorway. The years had done nothing to her beautiful figure. A womanly maturity replaced the girlish innocence that used to adorn her lovely face making her even more attractive than ever. Even now in her early thirties she could easily pass for twenty five. Strangers often mistook us for a couple.
As our trip neared the end, I realized that it was just what the doctor ordered. Connie was not grieving as much as before. We spoke about the things we would do when we returned home. I was taking over for Dad at the firm and Connie was planning to remodel the old house.
Once back in New England, I moved completely back into my own apartment and Connie got busy redecorating. We still saw each other but not as much as before the trip. She was doing well on her own now and she didn’t call on me as often. I was happy that she was getting back on her feet again but I missed being with her. I loved her more now than ever before but I just could not tell her. Furthermore, it was becoming obvious that this fine woman was getting on with her life. Exactly what that life would be, I was afraid to find out.
AN UNWELCOMED VISIT
Boat traffic was heavy in the bay that morning. I sat at my desk overlooking what looked like toy tugs and trawlers coming in and out of the harbor. A knock at my door broke my daydream. One of the associates in the firm poked his head in. It was Ron Taylor. Ron was early thirties, single and a wanna-be ladies man, a legend in his own mind.
“Come in Ron,” I said.
“Hi Jannick.” (It was beneath him to address me by my first name.) “Got a minute?”
“Sure Ron, what’s up?”
“Oh just thought I’d pop in to talk. How’s it going?” he asked as he made himself comfortable in my leather recliner.
This visit seemed strange to me since Ron never popped in any room I was in. He couldn’t care less about me since I took over for Dad but I obliged him anyway just to see what he was up to.
“Going OK Ron, thanks for asking. How about you, everything cool?”
“Oh yeah, you know me man, I’m totally cool.”
I wanted to say, ‘You cad, what the hell are you up to? Yeah, you’re totally cool like a shark.’ but I was pleasant.
“Good to hear it Ron so what can I do for you, anything?”
“No no I just wanted to talk a little. You know it’s been over a year since we lost your dad. How are you holding up, OK?”
“As good as can be expected Ron. It was a shock but I’m dealing with it one day at a time.”
Then he got down to brass tacks.
“Gregory” he said, “How’s Connie these days?”
His question hit me like a brick. I paused for a moment, glared at him and then replied,
“Not too bad, Ron. She’s coping as well as she can.”
“Good, good” he said, then added. “Well you know Greg, she’s available now. The accepted mourning period for a widow is one year and it’s been that already. Do you know if she’s dating?”
OH MY GOD! This S.O.B. is after Connie. My blood started to boil. I wanted to pick his scrawny little ass up and throw it out the window. He continued his little tirade.
“She’s a fine lady if you know what I mean. I wouldn’t mind calling on her. If she’s not involved with anyone, I might just do that.”
“So Ron are you asking for my permission to date Connie? If so, I can’t say one way or the other. She can speak for herself.”
“Well Greg, I’ve got to be honest. When you two went away for three weeks together, people here started talking. It looked like the two of you were an item. Of course I always said that the idea of a man dating his step-mom was ridiculous. I mean after all, mother and son dating? Come on.”
“What are you trying to say Ron?” I barked, my face getting a bit red.
“Oh don’t get riled up Greg. I’m just feeling the situation out. I mean a doll like Connie won’t be available long if she is indeed available. She’s got a lot to offer.”
“Well I don’t know what to tell you Ron. You do what you want to and I’m sure Connie will do the same. She’s a big girl now and you’re a big boy. Leave me out of it.”
“Okay, okay Jannick. Did I touch a nerve? You seem a bit upset. I’ll be leaving now. Take care.”
As he got up to leave, I wanted to say, ‘Don’t let the door hit your dumb ass on the way out, you bastard!’ But I kept my cool.
Once he was gone, it was all I could do to keep my head on straight. He was right. I’d been refusing to think about it but Connie was free now to date if she wanted to.
I was confused at this point. If she was to have another man in her life, I wanted it to be me and yet I didn’t want to press the issue. I was sure that if she had feelings for me, she would tell me and not just take up with someone else, especially a worm like Ron.
I knew what I had to do but I was unsure as to how to go about it. I sure didn’t want to blow it and now with that dog Ron Taylor sniffing at her door, there was a sense of urgency about the whole thing.
I called Connie later that day to see if we might get together to talk.
“Hi Mom” I said when she answered the phone.
“Oh hi Greg. How are you sweetie?” she replied.
“I’m good. Hey, I was wondering if we might get together sometime soon to talk.”
“Sure Greg I’d love to.”
“Great” I said, “What about Friday night?”
“Oh Greg I’m sorry. Friday night I’m busy. Hey you know Ron Taylor don’t you?”
My blood began to boil again at the mention of his name.
“Yeah I know him.” I said after a pause. I didn‘t say anymore.
“Well he called me up and asked me to dinner Friday night. I said yes but I don’t know Greg. I was shocked I guess it’s been so long since I’ve dated. I don’t know if I’m ready for it or not. I don’t think I could ever be with another man after being with your father. He was special you know?”
“Yeah Mom he was special. Well look, I don’t want to keep you. I know you’ve got things to do so maybe another time.”
“Well wait Greg don’t go yet. Didn’t you want to set up a time to talk?”
“Oh yeah Mom sure. Well… I’ll tell you what, I’ll call you this weekend or something. No big deal, OK? We’ll talk.”
I don’t know if it showed or not but suddenly my heart just wasn’t in it any longer.
“OK Greg. Bye now.” she said almost sadly as she hung up the phone.
I was crushed. I guess I waited too long and now my opportunity was waning.
Hell, who was I kidding? This fine woman was ten years my senior. I didn’t belong in her league. But Ron Taylor didn’t either. He was scum, a dirt bag.
If Connie sees anything at all in him, it would shock the hell out of me. What is she thinking going out with a slug like him? Connie can have any man on the planet. Why pick a sleaze ball like Ron Taylor?
My thoughts were beginning to drive me crazy. I was not ready for this reality. The only woman I’d ever loved and couldn’t have is now free and dating someone else, someone I would not cross the road for even if he were on fire.
FROM BAD TO WORSE
Connie and Ron went out that Friday night. I didn’t call her that weekend. I didn’t want to know any more about their sordid affair. My life was beginning to crumble around me. I didn’t care any more. Life sucked. I was beginning to close in on myself and that wasn’t good.
Ron Taylor poked his head in my door Monday morning to gloat and I wanted to rip it off his neck and spit down his throat. He could tell I was in no mood so he left without saying a word. He knew not to mess with me. I could break him like a bad habit.
He began spreading stories about his date with ‘Connie the Hottie’ as he was calling her. He had the whole firm talking.
Connie and Ron continued seeing each other for several more weeks. I didn’t say a word to either one about it. Then one Friday Ron started talking to everyone about making his ‘move’ soon. It’s just like a scum bag to broadcast his plans with no concern for a lady’s dignity. I couldn’t take it anymore.
He was sitting in his office when there was a knock, no it was more of a rap on his door. It was me and I was hot.
“Come in.” he instructed.
I barged through the door and blurted out.
“Let’s talk Buddy.”
“Sh sh sure….Jannick, come in a have a seat.” he replied nervously.
I planted my ass on his leather Barcalounger and propped my size 10’s up on his desk.
“How’s things going with Connie?” I demanded.
“Oh, OK Greg, I mean….just fine.”
“Good for you pal.” I said with a phony enthusiastic smile.
My seeming approval put him falsely at ease for a moment. It was this moment when he made his fatal mistake.
“Connie’s a hot babe Greg if you know what I mean. We’re hitting it off great. She’s got luscious lips man. I can’t keep her off me. In fact, I think…..no… I’m sure, tonight’s gonna be the night. I’m gonna make my move tonight.”
“Yeah so I heard….. from the whole staff!”
“Well Greg, I know it’s not like a man to kiss and tell but with a babe like Connie I guess I just can’t help myself. I’ve got to tell people.”
“No Ron you were right the first time. It’s not like a man to kiss and tell but it is like you, you little worm!”
I jumped from my chair, darted around his desk and grabbed the lapels of his Armani suit. I jerked him right up out of his seat. Then I jacked him against the wall ‘till his oxfords were up off the floor and I got right in his face.
“Listen you maggot!” I barked, “I don’t know who in the hell you think you are but if you don’t treat Connie with some decency and the respect she deserves, you and I are gonna finish what I just started. Do you hear me? Well do you?”
He nodded and damn near wet his pants. He didn’t expect this when I came in to see him. I didn’t expect to react that way either but I had had enough. I guess my passion got the best of me. I eased him back down, smoothed his wrinkled lapels, straightened his crooked tie and squeezed his mousy little face.
“Mark my words Ron.” I warned. “Connie deserves better than you.”
I left his office feeling like a Super Bowl quarterback who’d just thrown the winning touchdown pass. I was feeling good. For the first time in years, I was on the offensive and I was out to win.
I returned to my office with a sense of determination I never had before. I picked up the phone and called Connie.
“Hey girl,” I said when she picked up.
“Oh Greg I’m so glad you called. I haven’t heard from you in weeks! I was worried. I tried calling you several times but I can never seem to catch you. Is everything all right sweetie?”
“Everything’s cool Mom. I’ve just had a lot on my mind.”
“Oh Greg, I feel so bad. You wanted to talk to me weeks ago and I was busy. I feel like I let you down.”
“Never feel like you’ve let me down Mom. It’s not in you to let anyone down. You’re an angel.”
“Oh Greg, you say the sweetest things, just like your father. Are you busy tonight sweetie? Maybe we can have that talk. I’m making spaghetti. Come over for dinner, all right?”
“Don’t you have plans with Ron?”
“Oh I did but he called and canceled. Something came up.”
“Oh” I said, “That’s a shame. Well you know I could never turn down your cookin’ Mom. Sure thing, I’ll be there. Can I bring anything?”
“Yeah why don‘t bring a bottle of red.” she said.
“A bottle of red it is. I’ll be there around six.”
After work I headed home to get cleaned up. I stopped to get a bottle of Zinfindel and headed for the old house. I let myself in as usual. I made my way to the kitchen. I could have found it blindfolded just following the savory aroma of Connie’s sauce. It was divine. I found her at the stove wearing an apron over her perfectly proportioned jeans and a new lacey blouse. She was stunning. I slipped up behind her and gave her a peck on the cheek. Wisps of ‘Obsession’ filled my senses.
“Hi pretty lady.” I said.
She reached up and caressed my face with one hand and slipped me a taste of her sauce on the wooden spoon in the other.
“Mmmm” I hummed. “Heavenly Mom. You always were a great cook. Can I help you?”
“Sure, why don’t you pour some wine, glasses are on the table.”
I headed for the dinner table with bottle in hand. The table was bare.
“Nothings on the table Mom, you want me to set it?”
“Wrong table,” she replied. “The nook,” she added nodding in that direction. The nook was an old brick canning room that Connie had converted to an intimate little dining area reserved just for her and Dad. I had never had dinner in the nook before. Lit candles adorned the fine China place settings atop a beautiful lace table cloth.
The nook?, I thought to myself. Wine, candlelight dinner, what’s up with this? What’s going on here? Was this supposed to be for Ron?
I poured and Connie served dinner. We sipped wine and slowly dined on the sumptuous feast.
I complemented her as she cleared the table. Then she sat down again and I poured more wine.
“I never had dinner in the nook before Mom. It’s quite….intimate.”
“Did you like it?” she asked with a sultry hint in her voice.
“I loved it.” I replied.
Then I said something that could’ve brought the evening to a grinding halt.
“It’s a shame Ron had to miss it.”
“Ron?” She retorted somewhat puzzled, “This wasn’t for Ron sweetie. It was for you!”
“Just for you, Greg.”
There was a slight tone of annoyance in her voice. Any other woman would have hit the ceiling at this point but Connie wasn’t any other woman. She was always cool and collected. I should never have taken such a cheap shot. I felt bad after that. I had to smooth it over quickly.
“I shouldn’t have said that, Mom. I’m sorry. I’ve had a lot on my mind lately. This was just wonderful. Thank you so much. You truly are the sweetest lady I‘ve ever known.” I replied.
She smiled softly.
“It’s Ok Greg, just forget it. But you wanted to talk to me and the truth is, I’ve been wanting to talk to you too.”
“Well, mine wasn’t that important Mom.” I said obviously lying. “What did you want to talk to me about?”
“Greg,” she said hesitating, then finally continuing, “You know I love to hear you call me mom….It’s really sweet……. but I think you should call me Connie from now on.”
“OK Mom,.. I mean Connie. I only did it to make you feel better during the rough time last year. It kinda stuck like a nickname but if it bothers you, I’ll stop.”
“No Greg it’s not that it bothers me, I love it but it’s time to start calling me Connie again.”
“Well sure Connie, but……can I ask why?”
She hesitated briefly collecting her thoughts. She had something important to say and the right words were necessary.
“Well Greg……. you see……. during our trip to the Rockies, I realized some things. For one I realized that it was time for me to make a change. It’s time to stop grieving. I mean I loved your father dearly and I miss him terribly and I still think about him every day of my life but I can’t go on grieving. He wouldn’t want it that way. So it’s time to get on with my life you know ….to make a new start?”
“You mean to start dating again? Connie, you probably should if you really want to.”
“No Greg. Not to start dating again. That’s not what I mean. I’m not interested in dating again.”
“Well Connie, …..I’m sorry to ask ,….. but I’ve got to know….. what about Ron?”
“What about Ron? I had a few dinners with him. It was a mistake but it gave me a chance to get out, that’s all. Did you think I was really interested in Ron?”
“According to him, you were.”
“And you believed him?”
“I didn’t want to and it killed me just to hear him talk about you so I couldn’t listen anymore. I blocked it out as long as I could ….until today.”
“What happened today?”
“Well Connie, he’s been blabbing to the whole office about the two of you and he said he was going to make ‘his move’ tonight. Everybody was talking and I couldn’t stand it any more so I went to his office. I just wanted to let him know that you deserved more respect than he’d been giving you. I mean… the whole office knows what a hot kisser and a babe you are.”
“A what and a what? I’ll kill that little snake. He’s been saying that?”
“I’m afraid so Connie. I didn’t want to believe it and more than that I didn’t want to hear it anymore so I guess I shut him up.”
“Greg…. what did you do?” she asked somewhat concerned but amused as well.
“Well I warned him, that’s all…… I mussed his Armani suit a bit too.”
She broke out laughing.
“No wonder he canceled our date! It‘s sweet of you to defend me, Greg. Thank you but I think I can take care of myself. Wait ‘till the next time I see him. I’ll muss more than his suit.” she chuckled.
The jovial mood now got a bit more serious.
“Honestly Greg, I never kissed him. In fact, I never even touched him. Oh he wanted me too there’s no doubt. The man is horny. I just used him to pass some time. Now I wish I hadn’t. I guess Greg, all that we’ve been through has left me a bit confused, you know, the grieving and the healing. Your father meant the world to me. He was like the father I never had and now I find myself alone and wandering what to do with the rest of my life. I’ve got to get on with it Greg. It‘s time to get on with life, you know?”
She was anticipating my reaction. I was relieved to hear that Ron was full of crap. But now I didn’t know what to think about Connie. I wasn’t sure what she was telling me. I was afraid to know what she meant. My darkest fear came creeping in on me. Did she mean that she was leaving to start a new life? That’s how it sounded. If that was it, I didn’t want to know any more. My heart was breaking. It was tearing in two and yet I would do anything to make this wonderful lady happy….. even if it meant letting her go. This was it, no more hiding. If I was ever to tell this lovely creature exactly how I felt, it was now, win or loose, do or die. I mustered my courage and reached over to caress her tender hands. I looked deep into the beautiful blue eyes that have held me captive from the first moment I saw her, the ones that were filling my soul with awe even now.
“Connie”… I said quivering just a bit …..“When Dad first told me he’d found the one, I wanted nothing to do with you. I wasn’t about to share my dad or my home with anyone. Then you appeared like an angel in my doorway. When I looked into your eyes and I saw your beautiful face..… I was mesmerized. I fell in love with you Connie right then and there. You never knew my true feelings. I hid them. I locked them away. They could only cause trouble for all of us and so I buried them deep inside. As time went on I had hoped they would fade, but Connie… they only grew stronger. It’s been hell to keep them hidden all these years but I had to do it. You’ve meant so much to me. You’ve taught me everything about life, about love. You are the most gorgeous creature to ever walk the earth and as lovely as you are outside, you are even more so inside. I can honestly say that I love you more now than I ever did. You fill my life. You complete me. I don’t know what this relationship is. You are not my mother. I’m not your son. We are not lovers and yet I love you with every fiber in my being. I always have. I do know this Connie, that whatever this is, I don’t want it to ever end but if you’re telling me that it’s time for you to move on…. to find a new life, well…. please…. just promise that you’ll never forget me. I would never try to stop you from having the life you deserve. I’d do anything to make you happy. I live to see your smile and if it means ripping the heart right out of my chest, I’d do it for you. Just promise me that you will never leave me out of your life. I couldn‘t live without you in my life somehow.”
I was trembling uncontrollably at this point. I had finally unleashed the truth that had been bottled up inside me for so long. She had to hear it. If she was leaving, she couldn’t leave without knowing how I’ve felt all these years.
Tears were streaming down her lovely cheeks. My tears were flowing just the same. It was killing me to see her cry.
“I’m sorry to make you cry.” I said quivering. “I never wanted to do that.”
“Greg” she said softly, “People cry for different reasons.”
She rose from her seat and came to me. She sat crossways on my lap and caressed my head easing it gently against her tender breast.
“Oh Greg,” she whispered softly, “I’ve know all these years how you felt. A girl can tell. But I didn’t know it was hurting you so much inside. You should have told me. I would have helped you.”
“I couldn’t do that,” I sobbed. “You’ve been my guardian angel all these years. How do you tell an angel something like that?”
I was so choked up my words would barely come.
“I’ve been afraid this time would come when you would need to move on Connie,.. ..but please …if you are leaving,….don’t forget me.”
I wrapped my arms around her and pressed my head tight against her soft breast hoping to never let her go.
“Greg my love,” she whispered sweetly……“I’m not going anywhere baby. At least not without you. I’m in love with you too. That’s all I’m trying to say. We’ve been through a lot. Neither of us would have chosen this if we’d known it meant loosing your dad but here we are now and I’ve come to love you just as I loved him.”
Her sweet words flowed like soothing oil over me. I held her even tighter. We sat in that embrace for several wonderful moments.
“So where do we go from here?” I asked still trembling like a child.
She got up and put one leg over my knees and sat down on my lap facing me. She took my face in her soft hands and stared straight into my soul. The flickering candle light danced on her delicate face. Her gaze was hypnotic. She could control the world with those eyes. She leaned in slowly and pressed her supple lips against my cheek leaving a tender kiss behind. Her lips continued a slow and gentle glide towards mine kissing softly as they went. My years of wanting, of hiding, of dreaming, of denying were about to end. Her tender lips were about to free me from my bonds and unlock the chains that imprisoned me for so long. As our lips met, fireworks ignited inside my head. My heart was pounding and I could feel every beat right down to my fingertips. We kissed for the longest, breaking only to hug and caress and then we would kiss once more. Her lips were sweet like honey, her soft touch… to die for. I could have died right there on the spot in her tender embrace and it would all have been worth it. My life was now complete.
She tipped her head back gently and pulled me close and I tenderly kissed down the front of her neck. I could feel her heart throbbing in rhythm with mine.
“Oh Connie my love, my sweet, sweet love” I kept muttering. “If you could only know how much I’ve longed for you all these years. But it was so wrong. I locked it away inside me. I would take it to my grave. I would live my life alone if I couldn’t be with you.”
“But now my love,” she softly sighed….“it’s so right. I loved you too all those years but not in this way. You were a sweet boy that I couldn’t help but love. But this love was for your father alone. He’s gone now and you were right here when I needed you most. You mended my broken heart, Greg and you helped me to go on. Now I’m totally in love with you and I want to be yours forever. We’ve been together so long and we know each other so well, that now..…now my sweet love, it can only be right.”
My lips found hers once more and together they engaged in a long and passionate embrace. My lips on hers, something I only fantasized about but never thought possible. I didn’t want this moment to ever end. I wanted to take in every last morsel of it. I wanted this moment to be forever burned into my psyche. It was, after all, the pivotal point in my entire life. All my heartache, all my pain, all my longing had come down to this one solitary moment and I will cherish this moment for the rest of my life. It would define my future. A lifetime of love and sharing. A lifetime spent with a soul mate so desirable, so enchanting, so full of love and caring that life would not be worth living without her.
I met an angel. I breathed her in and she filled my soul.