Casey Ray's Life
It’s not easy to start a new school, especially when you don’t fit in. Everything was unfamiliar and bizarre to me. My new classmates looked at me like I was an alien. No one smiled at me and no one said hi. I was shy, silent and too afraid to start a conversation. I heard them whisper behind my back, “She’s fat . . . why is she so quiet? . . . she’s so huge . . . why doesn’t she ever smile?” I heard every single thing they said. I had never in my life thought I was fat but now I was self-conscious. I remained as quiet as a mouse and hid in the library during lunch time. Their words echoed in my head every step I took. The only way to feel better was to eat… and eat. Stuffing food in my mouth made everything instantly better. I didn’t have to think about all the horrible students who thought I was fat. I just had to focus on the food. My appetite increased and before I knew it I was putting on weight. But I couldn’t stop. I had to eat. It was my one way ticket out of feeling fat.
Grade 5- 2011
I thought they had given up but I was mistaken. The bullying stopped in grade four after a popular girl called Izzy befriended me. She was sweet and didn’t care if I was fat. The best thing was that Izzy was popular; no one dared to say a mean thing about me. I may have had Izzy on my side but I was still weak and that shy girl inside. As soon as Izzy turned her back for a minute I was cornered by two girls. Jaimie and Mariah. They were jealous that I had Izzy on my side. They were the type of girls who bullied fat people for fun. They pressured me to ditch Izzy but I ignored them. I could do this, until the name calling started. “You’re fat . . . and ugly . . . . Izzy only feels sorry for you... no one likes you . . . lose some weight fatty.” And the name calling didn’t stop. It only got worst. Jaimie and Mariah built a friendship with Izzy but for the wrong reasons. They persuaded Izzy to turn against me, exclude me, and shut me out. Izzy was all I had and she had let me down. And the only thing to save me was food.
Grade 7- 2013
Grade five seemed like a whole life time ago. After grade six had finished I moved states. I was far away from those bullies but what I didn’t know- was that other bullies were waiting for me… waiting to hurt me and break me. I made friends. These were nice girls and they were real. My friendship with them wasn’t fake or forced and they loved me fat or not. But my new best friend Bella had a younger brother who hated me because I was fat. And he wasn’t the only one. “You’re a beached whale . . . go home the beach is back that way . . .you were so fat and ugly that all the whales started singing we are family .” And the name calling didn’t stop. I couldn’t run from it and I couldn’t hide. Depression took over me like a dark storm cloud threatening to rain. Food was there for me as always but I couldn’t eat. I needed to lose weight otherwise they would never leave me alone. I couldn’t stay. I had to leave. Suicide? It just didn’t seem right. I felt like there was no option left for me. I was hurt and broken.
Grade 8- 2014 February
All I had to do was ask. Ask my friends for help and they were there for me. I was scared at first and hesitant to tell them about everything, scared that I would be rejected and hated. But these are true friends who stood up with me to fight the bullies. And now I’m not bullied. But this bullying has done a lot of damage in my life and I will never forget any of it. Verbal bullying hurts more than physical. I would rather be punched a few times than called awful names a couple hundred times. I am always self-conscious of how I look. I hardly even eat. I skip breakfast and lunch and only have a tiny bit of dinner. I’ve grown and lost weight but I still feel fat. No one calls me fat but I’m always going to be the fat girl. Don’t make the same mistake as me; get help straight away. You can’t fight a hundred bullies on your own, it’s impossible. It may look like your winning by ignoring them but I know that inside your hurting. Don’t ever forget that there’s people who love you always there to help. Never contemplate giving up, Together we will fight for what’s right.